Thursday, March 26, 2009

Jorian's first week at home

From the routine schedule of the NICU and hospital, we returned home... to very little routine whatsoever - day & night blurred, adult mealtimes shifted to accommodate infant mealtimes and diaper changes, altered conceptions of daily "accomplishments" - yes! I got dressed AND showered before 5 pm!

But after a while, we have found a pattern that simply revolves around Jorian's needs and seems to work pretty well (at least until it changes):
  • Sleep when he does (easier said than done)
  • Feed him when he shows early hunger signs and before he cries (he gets a little spastic when he's "beyond" being just a little hungry, which makes feeding challenging for all parties involved)
  • Change his diaper when he's in a food coma, not when he's hungry (unless you want to wake him or piss him off)
  • Eat when possible (don't defer so long that "hunger insanity" sets in)
  • Change his diapers regularly (to prevent seemingly unexplainable upset episodes)
  • Accept help from others - our support network has been amazing!
  • Remind oneself (constantly) to be amazed at how awesome this little creature is!
A little vignette: Last night, when Jori was in a Quiet Alert state of consciousness, I found that he could already turn his head (when lying on his back) to find me when I had moved out of his field of view. Later that night, he even moved just his eyes to find me, not his whole head. Amazing baby trick!

Another fun (very San Francisco) baby activity I just finished: getting him to suck 10 billion "probiotic" bacteria off my finger to colonize his gut after his initial formula feeding... Again, the things you'll do for your child...

And now some thoughts from Alison:

Between yesterday and today, I learned that one's entire outlook on life can really hang on two hours, plus or minus, of sleep. After a challenging night of nursing when Jori wanted to put everything in the world in his mouth BUT my nipple, I was congratulating myself on my coping skills - that is, until I hit rock bottom at 5 pm yesterday, at which point I collapsed. That was one of those moments that I thanked my lucky stars that I have Charlie. We all got into bed, ate macaroni and cheese together, and Charlie read to me from a children's book. When it comes to sleep deprivation, one of the best ways to handle it is to pretend you are a kid - eat comfort food, get into bed, and have a bedtime story! At one point last night when Jori was feeding, I looked up at the wall, which could be seen faintly by the glow of the nightlight. We had hung three photographs near his changing table: two of me pregnant and the third of the three of us exactly one week after Jorian was born. All over again I was hit with a sense of wonder - that this little miracle was with us.

Jorian Shea means "magical abundance." Though I do know exactly how he got here (and I'm not likely to forget the 14-hour labor), his presence in our lives does feel magical. I hope that I never lose that sense of being in on a stupendous secret. I've always known "where babies come from," but the reality of having a baby is something new and awe-inspiring. Even through the haze of sleep deprivation and a steep learning curve and all the worries we've endured over the last week, the mere fact of Jori overwhelms me with joy.

1 comment:

  1. This made me a bit teary. Just to give you a head's-up, that feeling Ali's having about being in on a secret? IT DOESN'T GO AWAY. Well, it hasn't for us. Check back during the teen years. ;) But for now, it's the greatest understanding Jason and I share- that we alone know how perfect, magical, beautiful, special and loved our children are. Now you two have that undersatnding about Jori. Just wait until he smiles at you!
    Ali: meltdowns are so normal. You're coming off one heck of a hormone ride! Eat all the mac and cheese (from Chenery Park?) you want. And I found it helpful to have bottles of water and bowls of trailmix around the house, so I could eat/drink when the kid did.
    Kiss Jori for us!
    xoxoxo
    -Erica

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